


RISE

by DistressApathy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Bashing, Character Death, Codependency, Dark Tony Stark, Emotional Manipulation, Fix-It of Sorts, Kid Peter Parker, M/M, Mental Instability, Moral Ambiguity, Panic Attacks, Paranoia, Slow Burn, Time Travel, Unreliable Narrator, World Domination
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:08:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29839914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DistressApathy/pseuds/DistressApathy
Summary: Waking up during his kidnapping in Afghanistan wasn't what Tony expected when he closed his eyes in that damned bunker.
Relationships: Butterfingers & Dummy & Jarvis & Tony Stark & You (Iron Man movies), James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark, Jarvis (Iron Man movies) & Tony Stark
Comments: 15
Kudos: 44





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warning :  
> \- English isn't my 1st language. I'm still learning.  
> \- Team cap unfriendly. Because Civil War and Endgame.  
> \- Pairing not decided yet. But it will be slash.

He's not sure how long he's been lying here. Blood pouring from his wounds, he could taste it on his lips. He couldn't feel his fingers and the lower parts of his body – probably lost to the harsh cold of Siberia (or maybe because of Rogers' violent and soon successful attempt at killing him). He feels like he was drowning. 

He was going to die here, he knew it. After being lied to, betrayed, beaten into a plump and left behind by someone he considered a friend, he is going to die here. Alone. Tony couldn't believe he had been so stupid. 

But it's not new is it ? He had always been groveling for affection. Begging for attention. And intentional or not, even his best friends took advantage of him. Even they couldn't be bothered to listen to what he had to say.

Tony didn't want to die here. Not when he just had the biggest revelation of his life. Not when he was finally thinking straight for the first time in years. Tears fell down from his eyes. He couldn't believe he had been so stupid. So much for being a genius. 

But was all of it so surprising? All the manipulation … They never respected him after all and he was the one who put most of the effort in maintaining their supposed friendship. They never cared. He just blinded himself into seeing otherwise.

And now, he was going to die. He was going to die regretting so many things that he could have prevented. He was going to die while Rogers and his boyfriend get their happy ever after.

_Fuck … If only he had the chance to do it all over again._

~~RISE~~

Tony Stark died bitter and alone in Siberia, surrounded by ice and seeing no other colors than the white of snow and the red of his own blood.

~~RISE~~

Waking up during his kidnapping in Afghanistan wasn't what Tony expected when he closed his eyes in that damned bunker.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1001 Words 
> 
> \- English isn't my 1st language.
> 
> \- Remember everyone : Canon divergence

Pain was all he felt as he opened his eyes. Tears were falling down his face. His screams were echoing inside the room as something sharp worked its way slowly inside his chest. He could feel blood _so much blood_ against his skin. 

He couldn't breath.

The agony was unberable. He choked when a sudden laugh escaped along his screams ~~_what a fucking joke_~~. His vision was blury, his tears not stopping. 

Someone was hovering above him _( ~~Rogers slamming his shield, again and again, against his chest~~ ). _

He knew this particular moment, it was engraved in his memory like a scar that will never fade from his skin. Strapped to a table, knife digging a hole inside his chest, blood dripping down and pain – so much of it.

Afganistan.

Open heart surgery.

No painkillers.

Yisen.

The Ten Rings.

Jerricho.

Tony wanted to chuckle – again – despite the horrible feeling coursing through his body. This was familiar. He could _live_ with this.

He was alive. 

~~RISE~~

Yisen was here.

Tony didn't know what to do about that. The guilt, the fondness and sense of obligation that he felt last time weren't present. He felt detached. He didn't know why _~~or maybe he did, Yisen was the beginning of his descent in hell after all~~ _.

His time with this man influenced many of the decisions he took back then. Decisions that he regretted. Decisions that got him killed. He didn't want to end up like that _ever_ again.

Once upon a time, Tony craved to be a _good man_. 

Nothing good came out of it.

~~RISE~~

He was tired, thirsty and hungry. The arc reactor was a comforting weight inside his aching chest. He was walking, under the hot burning sun, in the desert while dragging Mark I behind him. He couldn’t leave it behind – not when he knew what would happen.

Yisen was dead and Tony … Tony didn't feel sorry. _~~Tony didn't want to feel sorry~~. _

His body was struggling terribly but he continued to walk because he knew Rhodey was coming.

Rhodey .. His Rhodey who ended up being paralized because of **_them_ ** . ~~_Because of Tony._~~

Tony felt conflicted about him. James Rhodes was his best friend. Had been his best friend for years. Tony loved him and he knew Rhodey loved him too. But Rhodey … Rhodey had betrayed Tony once. Rhodey had other priorities. He had a family, other friends, a career … Rhodey wasn't attached to Tony the way Tony was attached to him.

And Tony could have lived with that. But Rhodey – _his bestfriend_ – had to go and steal from him. And as if it wasn't enough, he stood aside as Tony was chocked by Thor just after Jarvis death … ~~_and Jarvis_~~

Tony ground his teeth but continued to walk.

He wouldn't let any of that happen. 

~~RISE~~

Tony fell down on his knees when the rescue arrived, head lolling.

“ Tony? Hey, Tony? ”

Rhodey was young and walking on his own two legs. _~~Rhodey was falling and Tony couldn't catch him~~. _

“Next time, you ride with me” his best friend says, eyes shinning and voice shaking, as he kneel beside him. 

Tony nods because his vocal cords were ruined from screaming too much – the thirst and heat didn't help.

“The – thing in” cough “in my chest” cough “no one touch it" He force himself to say before fainting.

~~RISE~~

He let the military doctors check him up because he knew he needed this. He couldn't put his health at risk – not anymore. Tony, however, doesn't let them touch the arc reactor – it would be so easy to just rip it out.

*

Tony chose to remain in the military hospital that night. He wasn't ready to face the world yet and he was still unsure how to react to this James Rhodes.

It gives him the time to, now, properly think about everything that has been happening.

He was in the past.

Steve Rogers killed him.

The Winter Soldier ~~_James Barnes_~~ killed his parents.

Steve knew and didn't tell him.

Natasha knew and didn't tell him. She betrayed him _again._

And – 

Tony closed his eyes.

He should have known better. He really should have. 

He couldn’t let any of that happen. He wouldn’t let himself be vulnerable anymore. Not to them. _~~Not to anyone~~. _

Tony smiled.

~~RISE~~

Hate was a sentiment unfamiliar to him. Contrary to everyone's belief – Tony never hated his father. Anger was what he felt, so much anger. Tony couldn’t hate him ~~_Tony craved everything he had been willing to give._~~

He couldn’t even properly hate Obadiah.

Hate, Tony discover, is addictive. Hating someone was easy. And Tony hated Steve Rogers. ~~_He hated every single one of them_~~.

Hating them warmed his cold heart. It stopped him from thinking about his own responsibility. ~~_If Captain America get to shit on his responsibilities, why would Tony acknowledge his own?_~~

Tony loved hating them.

~~RISE~~

Seeing Pepper wasn't a pleasant experience. Tony loved her. But he also _~~surprisignly~~_ hated her. He hated that the woman he loved would in the future use his affection for her to control him.

He hated that he knew all along that they wouldn’t be good for each other.

He hated that she never tried to understand. 

So Tony kept his distance. He didn't need her anyway _~~He didn't He didn't He didn’t~~. _

~~RISE~~

“Welcome home, sir”

For the first time since his return, Tony felt his entire body relax.

“J, I missed you baby boy” he said as tears started pouring from his eyes.

Out of everything Tony went through, losing Jarvis had been the hardest to survive from. Even being killed by Steve Rogers didn't compare.

Jarvis wasn't the avengers. He wasn't Rhodey nor Pepper. Jarvis won't – will never turn his back on Tony.

Tony needed Jarvis.

And Tony will burn the world to ashes before he was going to let anything take Jarvis from him again.

**Author's Note:**

> My insta -> @distress_apathy


End file.
